Putting the "MO" in MOFO since 2004

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Thursday, January 12, 2006

 

I heart gay cowboys

I went to see the gay cowboy movie with my mom. It’s nice to have a mom who is willing to go see the gay cowboy movie. My dad refused to go, because he wasn’t so keen on the idea of watching gay love scenes. Neither was my baby’s daddy. So, Mom and I decided to go.

I must say, it was a feast for the eyes on so many levels. I am not much of a camper. My rule for traveling is this: NO SLEEPING ON THE GROUND. I have to say that the scenery in this film made me want to grab a few yards of canvas, pitch a tent, and sell the house to buy a horse. It was breathtaking, mesmerizing, awe-striking beautiful out there in Wyoming or wherever the movie was filmed. I really considered moving there. And I am a city girl through and through. The cinematography was mind boggling. Who knew a herd of sheep could become writhing cinema graphic art?

And then there’s Heath Ledger. I have never had the desire to grab a gay cowboy by his broad shoulders and plant a face-sucking passionate kiss right on him. Until now. Those cheekbones. That jawline. The beauty of them brings tears to my eyes.

And then there’s Jake Gyllenhal. Good Gravy, that man is intriguing. Those eyes. Those lips. That vulnerability. I just want to take him home, feed him a good meal, ask him to tell me a sad story, and then grab him by that finely chiseled waist and plant a big juicy, full-lipped lip lock on him.

Them boys are real nice. I wish I could quit ‘em. I do.

And a side note: Yes I love my husband, and I would definitely clear all of the aforementioned activities with him first. I think in this case he just might let me fulfill the fantasy. Just kissing of course. If he ever gets a chance to meet up with Angelina Jolie’s pillow lips, I would return the favor and offer him a little slack.

My mother and I left the theater and walked through the lobby, our minds still processing all that we had seen.

My mother said “You know, it was hard not to laugh.”

And I thought to myself, “laugh? That was one of the saddest movies I have ever seen!”

My mom continued “All I could think about was your dad and uncle Chuck, and all the time they spend together up at the cabin”.

My dad (Karate Black belt and avid gun collector) and uncle Chuck (former Marine) are so NOT gay that the thought of it left me near hysterical.

I have been laughing ever since.

5 Comments:

Blogger God's Child said...

I don't know, I was reluctant also, to see the movie. I still haven't been. hmmm...what am I afraid of?

I stand behind your policy 100% NO SLEEPING ON THE GROUND. God forbid the day should come when I have to. I have a bed, I'll just enjoy that until then.

8:43 AM  
Blogger Prego said...

I never thought I'd see the words "gay", "cowboy", "sheep" and "writhing" used in one of your blog entries. I'd imagine there are going to be a lot of disappointed googlers coming your way.

love
p

PS I am a big Heath Ledger fan in a completely hetero way, after seeing Lords of Dogtown. The boy can act.

10:57 AM  
Anonymous madge said...

GOD! What could be better than gay hot cowboys? NOT MUCH. I'm dying to see this movie. Both are dead sexy.

I'm all for camping if it's like a 5-star safari with wood frame tents, sleigh beds and real toilets. Then, you know, I'd TOTALLY go camping.

3:11 PM  
Blogger Mary Tsao said...

Them boys are too hot. And they're straight! Course, that still doesn't do me any good, but hey, a girl can dream, right?

And what is it with Ms. Jolie? I just had a conversation with a guy the other day who remarked, "She's hot. She's dirty. She probably doesn't shower regularly. Hehehehe." His leacherous laugh indicated that *not* showering is actually quite a turn on. I gotta try that some time...

Love the new pics!

8:26 AM  
Anonymous noell said...

A mother-daughter movie, huh? I'll have to try that one on my mom. She's lately been trying to understand, but not accept, the gay phenomenon.

In Kansas City, an old high school gay male friend took me gay-bar hopping once. We actually went into a country bar, and it was FULL of gay cowboys. I was shocked. Sorry, ladies, but they weren't like the two in the movie. They were huge, overweight, middle-aged men, slow-dancing with their boots and their hats on.

BTW, I'm a straight female. And Mary--the comment from that guy? Jolie not showering? Gross.

6:44 AM  

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